I was blessed to have two sons biologically. I made a weird, and as it turns out, not well thought out deal with my wife that if we had boys she would get to pick the first names and I would get the middle names, and if they were girls I would get to pick the first names and she the middle names. Well, we had two boys. She picks the first name of Jacob...and I go for the whole Wyatt Earp thing, and pick "Wyatt". This was in 1985 folks. I know it has become popular since, but it wasn't then. For the second boy she chose Bradley, and I was in a particular Bob Dylan mood then and went for the name of Dylan. Shortly thereafter "Beverly Hills 90210" happened and the name Dylan went viral. But my boy pre-empted all of that. If I would have had a third son I was going to put my foot down and I alone would name my son. His name would have been "Addicus Finch Fales."
But I didn't have a third son. Instead I was given different step-children for a little bit, until finally I was blessed with two daughters. I finally found the woman I was meant to be with, and besides giving me the wife I was always meant to have, she blessed me with two beautiful, intelligent, incredible daughters. I mean these are the real deal.
When I first arrived on the scene, the girls were teen-agers, and as we all know, this is the toughest part of anyone's life. And these girls were wounded. They were reeling from the abandonment of a father that was experiencing commitment issues, and where he wanted to be in life, and exploring a new love. And there I was. Not-so-suddenly on the scene. And so I was handed his two wounded daughters.
Can I say right from the start that I was confused? Daughters? Really? From a guy with only sons? What kind of cruel joke was this?
The older, from the beginning, sort of gave me the "cold shoulder". I prefer to think that she built up walls. The younger clung to me immediately. I was just what the doctor ordered. I was destined to fill a gap that her Daddy had left.
It has been a struggle to say the least. But the struggle I am experiencing has been life changing. I truly love my daughters as much as my sons. Being a positive male role model for daughters has been one of the most gratifying experiences of my life. My older may never come around. That's okay. Although the last card I got from her was signed "love", and that meant the world to me. But my younger and I are, at least to me, as close as two human beings can be. I love that little girl more than words can describe. I love her, worry about her, stress about her, think about her, wish I was there with her, everyday of my life.
These girls are awesome people. They are going to change the planet. Wish me luck on trying to guide them on the right path. Wish me luck in trying to be a positive role model. And for me here in Michigan, while they are in Florida, I guess all I can do is love their mom with all my heart, with all my soul, with all my being.
Good luck, my sweet daughters. Change this planet. Make it better. I have your back. But you've got my heart.
